Not really. [He shakes his head, though that might also be part of it. Someone who could force him to reign in his power, if needed.]
It's mostly that this place is kind of more dangerous than I thought it'd be? I mean, I showed up during a festival, and it was mostly just obnoxious pranks being pulled.
[Which was way more light hearted. And he'd been told about the Story Eater too, but that seemed like it had cleared everything up, from what he had understood, but now... He's not so sure.]
[Though... The auction is probably a poor way to do that, considering how... free form it was. Any demon summoned for any reason at a reasonable price, to be used as the summoner saw fit.]
... You really sure you want me to be able to summon you whenever I want? I thought you'd want to get away from me for a while.
[Going along with his plans or no, Kazuya's a teenager.]
[Though there is a touch of bitterness in his voice. He knows it's not the same Kazuya, but seeing him still faintly hurts. Watching his brother decimate his demonic backup and then simply go to town hitting him...]
[The tone itself has him shrink back into himself, just a bit. He knows he's been... kind of rude, but he thought he'd at least made it clear that he does like his cousin, that he does care for Naoya, and that he even likes being around him, more often than not.]
If I wanted to get away from you I wouldn't be here to begin with.
[They used to be so close, even after Naoya moved out, though even he'd ended up visiting less and less because Naoya had been more and more busy in the few months before the lock down.
And then the lock down had strained things further between them, even if in the end Kazuya had chosen Naoya over everyone else because he trusted him.
He still does, though now he's not sure if the feeling is mutual, considering their different outcomes.]
[He's quiet for a few moments, just... mulling over things. He knows he's not being fair, but he just... he's so tired. Maybe his answer lies in some knowledge of other worlds, so he's been trying to learn about them...]
[But he's weary and exhausted and the lockdown wasn't kind on him either. Sure, he was better equipped with a hideaway and food stores, but he'd barely slept, barely eaten... he'd put everything on the line and gotten... worse than nothing in return.]
[He runs his hands through his hair and tries to shake off the moment, even if he knows it's not so easy for Kazuya either.]
I know. ... I know. I just... never mind.
[Anything he says isn't going to be enough.]
... I know I've been hard on you. I've known about the War of Bel since... well, before either of us were born in this lifetime. I spent every bit of energy I could for over two decades preparing for it, trying to find a way.
[And then the Internet spread all over, and he had an answer.]
I've been hard on you because I've known what was coming. And now I don't.
[When one reaches the end of the line, there's no way to know what's beyond the last stop.]
I don't care about that, Naoya. I followed you because I trusted you. That you knew what was best. Because you gave me the best possible answer to take in what time I had to choose.
[And... Naoya had let him choose. It would have been so easy for Naoya in his infinite experience to railroad him down his path. Make it so that there couldn't have ever been any other way.
But he didn't. He didn't force him a single step of the way other than starting the initial lock down, only presented the option.
This time he closes the distance again, wrapping his arms around his cousin from behind in a tight hug.]
I still trust you, even if you don't know. And I want you to trust me that I'll figure something out for you, somehow.
[He flinches at the hug but doesn't otherwise try to pull out of it. It's... soothing, but weird. He should be the one trying to soothe Kazuya.]
[Fuck, he needs a drink.]
[Naoya leans back into Kazuya's shoulder and closes his eyes.]
I trust that you'll try.
[He hadn't found anything else other than killing God. Bowing to Him wasn't an option, ever. Killing the caster of a curse usually ended the curse, except in powerful ones. And this was powerful... but he had no options left.]
[What does he want...? To save Naoya. To protect the people that matter to him. To give into the factors of Bel inside him and kill God and all of the angels. To make them hurt and suffer and pay for everything they'd done to him. To Naoya. To his friends and the people he cares about.
There's so much he wants, but nothing he can do here. He just has to trust that the him that's awake is still fighting, and still winning, and that after everything is said and done, he'll keep the knowledge that he has here, that there's another Naoya who is suffering, another him who had made the wrong choice, for whatever reason.
His grip tightens on his brother, maybe a little too much.]
[It hurts, to have their roles so reversed. He knew it was a possibility, but... he can't help but feel awful ever time an Abel protects him rather than the other way around. What a terrible big brother he is - what a terrible person he is.]
[He lifts a hand to rest on Kazuya's arm and just... goes quiet for a bit. He doesn't know what to say to make this any better. He can't make it better. He's already fucked up everything... again.]
[Naoya gave him and his friends COMPS. Gave him the Laplace Mail, and gave them everything they needed to survive Gods ordeal and then some. Maybe he hadn't directly, physically helped, but he had helped none the less.
He'd even helped with saving Amane, too. And he knows how Naoya, how this Naoya, must feel about that.]
I did what I could. I couldn't have you dying on me.
[Not when Kazuya was so important to his plans. But maybe, just maybe... does he care about Kazuya as Kazuya? He's not sure. He's certainly one of the more strong-willed Abels he's seen in his lifetimes.]
[The sentiment makes him feel faintly anxious, and he mentally backs away from it.]
You gave me choices, Naoya. I know it would have been so easy for you to force me to take your path. To keep me from seeing any other options.
[With, perhaps, the exception of Remiel's, but the angels were particularly underhanded anyway, from what he'd experienced.
He can't help the sharp breath he takes. Naoya had called him his baby cousin. There's a part of him there that cares for him as he is, as Kazuya. Not just Abel. Not just as the brother he'd apparently murdered.
Sure, they swap between brother and cousin often enough, but here he lets himself feel that maybe it's more pointed than normal.
His grip tightens further on Naoya, likely uncomfortable at this point.]
[It's uncomfortable, but he doesn't complain. He doesn't want Kazuya to think that he's hurting Naoya. He lets out a long breath and closes his eyes.]
There were other options. I didn't think them as important as the one I offered, and I trusted that you would see sense. Maybe in some version of events you took them, but... I know you. I knew you'd want to save as many people as you could.
[Atsuro's idea had been... interesting... but it would have still left the government with too much power over the situation. Getting rid of the demons would have been the same. As for fleeing... he didn't help raise a coward.]
[Naoya is right. He would want to save as many people as possible. He still does, even at the steep price it came at.
But here, there's one person he wants to protect more than anyone else, and that's Naoya. Naoya, who he has the feeling is afraid of him, in some capacity. In a way, it's been eating at him, a persistent gnaw that keeps him up at night sometimes here.
He wants to protect Naoya. And while he could easily do that without the binding of a demonic contract, part of him hopes that same binding means that Naoya might find some measure of peace in the fact that Kazuya would be entirely incapable of hurting him.
So he swallows thickly, pulls away and slowly sinks into a kneel, head bowed low, vulnerable.]
I know you're afraid of me, Naoya. [He states, simple and even.] Of what I could be capable of. Of what I might do to you. [For reasons that are real to Naoya, and seem like a joke to him, because he couldn't ever raise a hand against Naoya to begin with, but...]
I want you to contract me. Not just so I can protect you, but so I can't hurt you, ever.
... Of course I am. Any reasonable person would be.
[He says it quietly, with intent. He wants to make sure Kazuya takes in every word.]
But I don't think a contract will make you feel any better. It'll bind you to not harm me, yes. ... But being bound may only make your situation worse. Do you think the factors of Bel will simply take being bound quietly?
And... I want you to find a solution to your problem that relies on your own control. If I'm directing everything... what are you going to do when I'm gone?
[Naoya is right. Any reasonable person would be absolutely terrified of him. Most are, and he can live with that, at least until it comes to Naoya being afraid of him. Of Yuzu or Atsuro being afraid of him.
And Yuzu had been afraid of him. Maybe Atsuro had too, but at least he'd stuck by his side in the end.
Kazuya bites his lip in response. He'd given this so much thought. Mulled over it, over the options he had. It's not about him feeling any better. It's not about the factors of Bel inside him that would surely rage against such a binding in a bid to be free.
He can contain that, he's sure of it. What he can't stand, however, is Naoya being fearful of him.]
I'll figure it out when I need to. [His voice is sharp, curt.] I don't want you to be afraid that I'll hurt you. The factors of Bel don't matter, I'll contain them like I have been.
[Fine, for the most part. Poorly, for the rest. Bel is a being of destruction, after all, and sometimes that's enough to make him antsy, to release that destructive urge.]
[If he's really sure... Naoya isn't convinced that this is a good idea, but...]
Do you want the long way or the short way?
[He's contracted with demons before. It's always on a knife's edge, the deal... but there's a difference on how hard the deal is to cut. He'd not made the bonds in the Demon Summoning Program particularly strong - hence the need to defeat the demon first.]
[But this might warrant doing it the long, stronger way.]
[The short way would likely be through the COMP, wouldn't it? And Kazuya knows how contracting demons the first time through COMPs goes. He couldn't ask that of Naoya, and he couldn't do that either.
But Naoya is relenting, at the very least. It eases some of his own worries, and the tension he'd held in his shoulders relaxes a bit as he looks up at him. No matter what, even if he is a demon, even if he's the King of demons, he's still him.
But that also makes him wonder. He's offering his services, what could Naoya offer in return? He's still unsure about contracting demons outside of the COMP even works.]
[He sighs and stands, leading Kazuya to the kitchen after he grabs a pen. He'd... been prepared. Not for this particular summoning, but...]
[He opens a cabinet and grabs a container of salt. He then nudges some of the furniture away to clear a space for himself. He then stops and looks at the floor, a slight frown on his lips. How is he going to...]
[His gaze falls on one of the soft rugs and he grabs one, gesturing towards the couch.]
This is going to take a bit to build. You might want to get comfortable. Fortunately I already know the specific information about you that I'll need for the runes.
[Kazuya follows dutifully, watches as Naoya grabs the salt and a pen, and then grabs the rug, and gestures for him to sit on the couch.
Which he does.]
Let me know if you need anything. I can get it.
[He doesn't want to just sit there, but again, he doesn't really know the specifics of forging a contract. Even when he summons demons by force, it's not because he's contracted them, and more that they're obligated to him.]
[He's gone into focus mode, taking out the pen and making a large circle. It's slightly wobbly due to the material, but it'll serve. He starts scribbling runes along the outside in a language that looks nigh-incomprehensible.]
[... He's at it for a while, taking care to keep the smallest of them clear enough to work. He's had plenty of experience with these things, and he knows how precise they need to be and where they don't need to be.]
[... And Naoya has been lost to him. He knows that look, that intense hyper focus, and part of him can't help but be a little nervous as he watches. What will it be like, to be bound to Naoya? To be forced to obey whatever it is he wants from him?
It's also a bit scary, if he thinks about it that way, but he does trust his cousin, trusts him so wholly that he's offered up what amounts to his free will. Trusts that he won't abuse that.
So he watches him with the same intensity, and the factors of Bel seem to flicker to life inside of him with every rune that Naoya draws, a deep loathing for the thought of being bound by anyone.
Kazuya stuffs those feelings back down inside of him. They don't get to choose. He does.]
(no subject)
It's mostly that this place is kind of more dangerous than I thought it'd be? I mean, I showed up during a festival, and it was mostly just obnoxious pranks being pulled.
[Which was way more light hearted. And he'd been told about the Story Eater too, but that seemed like it had cleared everything up, from what he had understood, but now... He's not so sure.]
(no subject)
[No, he's not letting this go.]
(no subject)
[Though... The auction is probably a poor way to do that, considering how... free form it was. Any demon summoned for any reason at a reasonable price, to be used as the summoner saw fit.]
(no subject)
Who else do you think is going to buy you other than me? If I could even afford it.
[Yes, he could cheat and give himself more macca. But he wouldn't actually have it, and demonic deals are rather particular about cheating.]
(no subject)
[.... Which sounds exceptionally weird and bad to ask to make himself more affordable.]
(no subject)
[Going along with his plans or no, Kazuya's a teenager.]
[Though there is a touch of bitterness in his voice. He knows it's not the same Kazuya, but seeing him still faintly hurts. Watching his brother decimate his demonic backup and then simply go to town hitting him...]
(no subject)
If I wanted to get away from you I wouldn't be here to begin with.
[They used to be so close, even after Naoya moved out, though even he'd ended up visiting less and less because Naoya had been more and more busy in the few months before the lock down.
And then the lock down had strained things further between them, even if in the end Kazuya had chosen Naoya over everyone else because he trusted him.
He still does, though now he's not sure if the feeling is mutual, considering their different outcomes.]
(no subject)
[But he's weary and exhausted and the lockdown wasn't kind on him either. Sure, he was better equipped with a hideaway and food stores, but he'd barely slept, barely eaten... he'd put everything on the line and gotten... worse than nothing in return.]
[He runs his hands through his hair and tries to shake off the moment, even if he knows it's not so easy for Kazuya either.]
I know. ... I know. I just... never mind.
[Anything he says isn't going to be enough.]
... I know I've been hard on you. I've known about the War of Bel since... well, before either of us were born in this lifetime. I spent every bit of energy I could for over two decades preparing for it, trying to find a way.
[And then the Internet spread all over, and he had an answer.]
I've been hard on you because I've known what was coming. And now I don't.
[When one reaches the end of the line, there's no way to know what's beyond the last stop.]
(no subject)
[And... Naoya had let him choose. It would have been so easy for Naoya in his infinite experience to railroad him down his path. Make it so that there couldn't have ever been any other way.
But he didn't. He didn't force him a single step of the way other than starting the initial lock down, only presented the option.
This time he closes the distance again, wrapping his arms around his cousin from behind in a tight hug.]
I still trust you, even if you don't know. And I want you to trust me that I'll figure something out for you, somehow.
(no subject)
[Fuck, he needs a drink.]
[Naoya leans back into Kazuya's shoulder and closes his eyes.]
I trust that you'll try.
[He hadn't found anything else other than killing God. Bowing to Him wasn't an option, ever. Killing the caster of a curse usually ended the curse, except in powerful ones. And this was powerful... but he had no options left.]
... What do you want, right now?
(no subject)
There's so much he wants, but nothing he can do here. He just has to trust that the him that's awake is still fighting, and still winning, and that after everything is said and done, he'll keep the knowledge that he has here, that there's another Naoya who is suffering, another him who had made the wrong choice, for whatever reason.
His grip tightens on his brother, maybe a little too much.]
I want to protect you.
(no subject)
[It hurts, to have their roles so reversed. He knew it was a possibility, but... he can't help but feel awful ever time an Abel protects him rather than the other way around. What a terrible big brother he is - what a terrible person he is.]
[He lifts a hand to rest on Kazuya's arm and just... goes quiet for a bit. He doesn't know what to say to make this any better. He can't make it better. He's already fucked up everything... again.]
I'm... supposed to protect you, you know?
(no subject)
[Naoya gave him and his friends COMPS. Gave him the Laplace Mail, and gave them everything they needed to survive Gods ordeal and then some. Maybe he hadn't directly, physically helped, but he had helped none the less.
He'd even helped with saving Amane, too. And he knows how Naoya, how this Naoya, must feel about that.]
(no subject)
[Not when Kazuya was so important to his plans. But maybe, just maybe... does he care about Kazuya as Kazuya? He's not sure. He's certainly one of the more strong-willed Abels he's seen in his lifetimes.]
[The sentiment makes him feel faintly anxious, and he mentally backs away from it.]
You're still my baby cousin, demon king or no.
(no subject)
[With, perhaps, the exception of Remiel's, but the angels were particularly underhanded anyway, from what he'd experienced.
He can't help the sharp breath he takes. Naoya had called him his baby cousin. There's a part of him there that cares for him as he is, as Kazuya. Not just Abel. Not just as the brother he'd apparently murdered.
Sure, they swap between brother and cousin often enough, but here he lets himself feel that maybe it's more pointed than normal.
His grip tightens further on Naoya, likely uncomfortable at this point.]
(no subject)
There were other options. I didn't think them as important as the one I offered, and I trusted that you would see sense. Maybe in some version of events you took them, but... I know you. I knew you'd want to save as many people as you could.
[Atsuro's idea had been... interesting... but it would have still left the government with too much power over the situation. Getting rid of the demons would have been the same. As for fleeing... he didn't help raise a coward.]
(no subject)
But here, there's one person he wants to protect more than anyone else, and that's Naoya. Naoya, who he has the feeling is afraid of him, in some capacity. In a way, it's been eating at him, a persistent gnaw that keeps him up at night sometimes here.
He wants to protect Naoya. And while he could easily do that without the binding of a demonic contract, part of him hopes that same binding means that Naoya might find some measure of peace in the fact that Kazuya would be entirely incapable of hurting him.
So he swallows thickly, pulls away and slowly sinks into a kneel, head bowed low, vulnerable.]
I know you're afraid of me, Naoya. [He states, simple and even.] Of what I could be capable of. Of what I might do to you. [For reasons that are real to Naoya, and seem like a joke to him, because he couldn't ever raise a hand against Naoya to begin with, but...]
I want you to contract me. Not just so I can protect you, but so I can't hurt you, ever.
(no subject)
[He says it quietly, with intent. He wants to make sure Kazuya takes in every word.]
But I don't think a contract will make you feel any better. It'll bind you to not harm me, yes. ... But being bound may only make your situation worse. Do you think the factors of Bel will simply take being bound quietly?
And... I want you to find a solution to your problem that relies on your own control. If I'm directing everything... what are you going to do when I'm gone?
(no subject)
And Yuzu had been afraid of him. Maybe Atsuro had too, but at least he'd stuck by his side in the end.
Kazuya bites his lip in response. He'd given this so much thought. Mulled over it, over the options he had. It's not about him feeling any better. It's not about the factors of Bel inside him that would surely rage against such a binding in a bid to be free.
He can contain that, he's sure of it. What he can't stand, however, is Naoya being fearful of him.]
I'll figure it out when I need to. [His voice is sharp, curt.] I don't want you to be afraid that I'll hurt you. The factors of Bel don't matter, I'll contain them like I have been.
[Fine, for the most part. Poorly, for the rest. Bel is a being of destruction, after all, and sometimes that's enough to make him antsy, to release that destructive urge.]
Besides. I know you won't take advantage of it.
(no subject)
Do you want the long way or the short way?
[He's contracted with demons before. It's always on a knife's edge, the deal... but there's a difference on how hard the deal is to cut. He'd not made the bonds in the Demon Summoning Program particularly strong - hence the need to defeat the demon first.]
[But this might warrant doing it the long, stronger way.]
(no subject)
[The short way would likely be through the COMP, wouldn't it? And Kazuya knows how contracting demons the first time through COMPs goes. He couldn't ask that of Naoya, and he couldn't do that either.
But Naoya is relenting, at the very least. It eases some of his own worries, and the tension he'd held in his shoulders relaxes a bit as he looks up at him. No matter what, even if he is a demon, even if he's the King of demons, he's still him.
But that also makes him wonder. He's offering his services, what could Naoya offer in return? He's still unsure about contracting demons outside of the COMP even works.]
(no subject)
[He opens a cabinet and grabs a container of salt. He then nudges some of the furniture away to clear a space for himself. He then stops and looks at the floor, a slight frown on his lips. How is he going to...]
[His gaze falls on one of the soft rugs and he grabs one, gesturing towards the couch.]
This is going to take a bit to build. You might want to get comfortable. Fortunately I already know the specific information about you that I'll need for the runes.
(no subject)
Which he does.]
Let me know if you need anything. I can get it.
[He doesn't want to just sit there, but again, he doesn't really know the specifics of forging a contract. Even when he summons demons by force, it's not because he's contracted them, and more that they're obligated to him.]
(no subject)
[He's gone into focus mode, taking out the pen and making a large circle. It's slightly wobbly due to the material, but it'll serve. He starts scribbling runes along the outside in a language that looks nigh-incomprehensible.]
[... He's at it for a while, taking care to keep the smallest of them clear enough to work. He's had plenty of experience with these things, and he knows how precise they need to be and where they don't need to be.]
Now what was the time you were born... ah.
[Scribble, scribble.]
(no subject)
It's also a bit scary, if he thinks about it that way, but he does trust his cousin, trusts him so wholly that he's offered up what amounts to his free will. Trusts that he won't abuse that.
So he watches him with the same intensity, and the factors of Bel seem to flicker to life inside of him with every rune that Naoya draws, a deep loathing for the thought of being bound by anyone.
Kazuya stuffs those feelings back down inside of him. They don't get to choose. He does.]
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